Thursday, 8 March 2007


What kind of cereal defines you? I am approaching 25 and I feel i'm turning into muesli. I fit this (newly created) stereo type. I'm wearing a brown jumper. I watch countdown. Supertramp's "Breafast In America"?... like it! I'm single. (Maybe this is connected with the previous sentence). I'm not even Alpen. I'm a no added sugar museli.

I used to love Weetos and Metallica. I remeber the adverts for Weetos when they first came out. They made it look like you were going to get massive chocolate hoops. From the cartoon perspective of the advert one weeto should have filled your whole bowl. Ah the disappointment. It was like getting that "Cadbury's Creme Egg" easter egg only to discover it was hollow. I WANTED FONDANT GOD DAMMIT!

Sorry. This stems from the fact I know I'm going to have muesli for breakfast tomorrow. It is nourishing and dependable. Its the kind of cereal that you could take home to meet your parents and they would approove. Pop Tarts? It will end in tears. They will have a fling with a croissante and probably ask some Lucky Charms to watch. Dirty pop tarts; the breakfast swinger.

Wonder who I'm compatable with? Could go eitherway I suppose.... I could graduate and settle down with some All Bran. A fiberous pairing that would see my heart healthy as "The Logical Song" plays accross the breakfast table. If this happened I would almost certainly have a midlife crisis as a young upstart like "Optivita" catches my eye. I think I'm on the lookout for some crunchy nut corn flakes. Crunchy nut cornflakes are essentially a kids cereal packaged for adults. That would keep me young and I wouldn't look twice at the Optivita then. Mmmmm.


Mr Axl said...

I felt the exact same way when I got my first Creme Egg easter egg. They're really missing out there. It would be so popular.

I never liked Weetos. I remember bedgering my mum for some once for ages, only to get home, eat some, and find out they're disgusting and taste like cat food.

It's nice to remenice on childhood disappointment.

han said...

The best cereal in the world is OPTIMUM POWER. It's about £4 a box from Uhuru, but I swear that shit's got magical powers. Either that, or I just like the name.

Dirty, dirty pop tarts.

Pipsywoo said...

I'm not a huge fan of cereal, toast and marmite is a much better option. But when I do cereal myself off, I like my plain and straight to the point, although I wouldn't say I dress in the fashion of an All Bran fan, yeah sorry about that but I love it with raisins and a sprinkle of sugar. Failing that, Country crisp stylee munch and yoghurt.

Maybe you should make your own large Creme Egg by buying loads of little ones and hollowing them out...therefore making the ultimate Creme Egg EVER!

han said...

it's already been done! check out pimp that snack